Embracing the Journey: Caring for Mental Health with MS

Today started early, thanks to my dogs waking me up at 6 AM. I let them out and enjoyed the cool, pleasant morning air, wishing the whole day could stay like this. It would be nice to spend more time out of bed without the oppressive humidity weighing me down.

Later, as I let the dogs back in, I found myself on the ground—not from a fall, but from my heart acting up. Living with both tachycardia and bradycardia means my heart can be unpredictable. One time, it landed me in the hospital. Nurses kept adjusting the beeping machines because my heart rate kept dropping below the threshold. The doctor told me my heart rate had dropped to 37 beats per minute overnight, and I might need a pacemaker.

Hearing "you're so young" from the pharmacist about my strong pain medication dose has become a regular occurrence. But this is my life with MS— a condition that can affect young people and progressively worsen over time. I was diagnosed at around 30, full of energy, running and playing with my son. Now, at 43, I can still do many things, but not at the same level as before. I notice the progression, even when my MRI shows no change. 

I sarcastically wish I could be as "stable" as my MRI. But the point of all this is perseverance. Taking care of my body physically, mentally, and spiritually is crucial. The placebo effect is real—mindset and inner happiness can make a significant difference. Stress and worry only exacerbate my symptoms.

Over the years, I've gone from no medication to a regimen that includes heart meds, nerve pain meds, muscle relaxers, anxiety meds, and MS medications. In addition to medication, I rely on yoga, meditation, mindfulness, massage, therapy, and other activities to maintain a positive outlook on tomorrow.

I have MS, but it doesn't have me. It can wreak havoc on my body, but each roadblock it puts in my way is an opportunity to find a new path. I've learned to grieve the "me" of 10 years ago, 5 years ago, or even yesterday, and to accept who I am today and tomorrow. Embracing less perfection and being content with my current self allows me to enjoy family time and the things I can still do.

I was given more than six months to live, and every moment is precious—good, bad, or ugly. Even bad moments teach us something. Just like learning to ride a bike involves a few falls and scrapes, life is a continuous process of learning, discovery, and inner strength.

So, I persevere and stay strong through all the ups and downs. Life isn't a straight path but a bumpy road with twists and turns. No one said it would be easy, but I'm determined to navigate it with resilience and hope.

Here's to embracing each day, taking care of our mental health, and finding strength in every challenge.